Sunday, May 20, 2012

sCeHaAsNoGnEs

Last week I had the great privilege of sitting down to a Jimmy John's lunch with a good friend and chatted for a solid 60 minutes about God...girls...and what else?  Oh yes, of course.  Guitars.  You know, all of the important things in a man's life.  In the conversation the theology of change was briefly thrown around.  Not because we claim to be theologists; that's just one of those words I like to throw around because it makes me feel smart...and cool.  Like Rob Bell, only without the glasses.

A lot of change has happened and continues to happen in every area of my heart, of me, of Thomas.  And before I go any further, I want you to be fully aware that I am not claiming to know the reasoning or the inner workings of God's changing seasons.  The truth that I am holding fast to, however is the fact that everything that lives, changes.

If we look around right now.  Go ahead, do it.  (I promise I'm not hiding behind that chair behind you.  Or am I...?)  Now take note of everything, if anything, that is living.  Has that living thing stayed the same?  Let me rephrase that.  Say you have been around this living thing for 50 days.  Is that living item the same on day 50 as it was on day 1?  Unless you're standing next to Captain America I can pretty well guarantee that it has in some fashion undergone a season(s) of change.  Everything does!  There is not one living item/creature that does not change in some capacity.  Within life, if there is no change, there is death.  Paul warns us about that all throughout his various writings within the New Testament, but that is another teaching for another time.


Recently, after close to a year of ignoring convictions, countless meetings with pastors and trusted mentors, and lots of sleepless nights full of prayer, I decided that it was time that I recognized a season change.  I was apart of leading a ministry with three other men where we talked a lot about change, we taught on it, we experienced, we lived it.  And I will be the first to admit that I am excellent at giving advice, but utterly horrible and receiving it (even when it's my own advice).  So after 12 years of music ministry service within the same congregation, I recognized that a new season had come and that I needed to flow before I caused more harm than good.  


And something I learned early into this new season change is that within growth there is ALWAYS sacrifice.  If you are not sacrificing something, you are not growing, hate to tell you.  And if you are 100% full, don't be shocked when you cannot take on that extra 20% of whatever you have your eyes on, because it just will not happen.  Try giving up 20% before you can receive 20%.

So that is where I am; smack dab in the middle of a monumental season change.  [Ah ha!  Did you catch the title?!  Did it confuse you?!  "seasons CHANGE")  I purposefully haven't gone into great detail about anything within this blog.  What I wanted to accomplish more than anything from this post is just to tell you that I am sorry for the feelings and egos that have been hurt in the process of this changing season.  I apologize for the poor communication on behalf of anyone and everyone involved.  I know there are hurt feelings out there because I have been experiencing them.  Every day.  For the past month.  So please, if you have any questions or want to express anything, please feel free to do so.

I love you all for the thoughts and the prayers for me during this time.  I may not know your exact words, your exact thoughts, or your exact actions, but I thank you nonetheless.  And I thank you for your eyeballs, because after all, this blog would be pretty difficult to read without them...

with love,
---thomas

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